Friday marks the beginning of a new year, as well as the end of a decade. So much has happened globally over the past 10 years, but quite a bit has happened to me in the past decade, too. Some things of note:
2000 - we all survived the impending doom of the ominous Y2K haha
2001 - the Sept. 11th that changed the world, and instigated my fear of flying
2002 - graduated from high school, began college, grandfather Vern passed away
2003 - car accident that resulted in my car being totaled and a large scar on my right inside forearm.
2004 - joined my sorority, Alpha Sigma Pi
2005 - engaged, got our kitty Chloe
2006 - graduated college Phi Beta Kappa, married my high school sweetheart, moved back Santa Barbara, began 1st full-time job
2007 - grandmother Lorraine passed away, got our dog Kobe, bought our first new car (our Subaru Outback)
2008 - promoted to manager at work, diagnosed with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome
2009 - open heart surgery
The aught years have been challenging ones, but as with all things, there is a ying to the yang. Thankfully, I have known many joys in the last decade as well as faced and conquered a fair share of challenging obstacles. The last few years have been especially difficult, but I have faith that good things are in store for Jason and I in the years ahead. My hope for the year ahead is simple and yet few attain it fully: peace. Peace of mind, body and soul. I hope to be content, to reflect and find meaning in challenging situations, to live a healthful life, to love openly and completely and appreciate those around me instead of take them for granted. I want to take pleasure in everyday things and find beauty in the mundane. In short, I want to give thanks for every day. Having open heart surgery made me realize, very quickly, that we are not guaranteed anything. Time is precious. LIFE is precious. Things might seem hard, but at least you're alive to work through it and keep pressing on to a new day, a new opportunity for change, a chance for things to get better.
Since the surgery, I have been taking daily walks. They began at just a few blocks and have now evolved in to nearly an hour. I walk to the bluffs overlooking the ocean, weave through neighborhoods, and it's amazing how beautiful my surroundings are. There is a stump in a dog park I walk to that sits on the edge of a cliff where you can see nearly a mile in each direction of sand and water and watching the sun glint off the rippling waves and the seagulls diving cleanly in to the ocean is so calming and wonderful and I come home feeling invigorated and alive. I always have my iPod going and one day I felt so good that I started dancing, right there in the street, to I Gotta Feeling by the Black Eyed Peas. It seemed like a good thing to do, so I did. It made me happy. I couldn't stop myself; my feet started moving to the beat of the music before I could rationalize what others might think if they saw me and I didn't care, and it felt right and it was FUN. I hope to feel like that every day, to just feel wonderful about being here, simply because the alternative is always possible and I never want to forget how lucky I am to be ALIVE.
So happy new year, best of luck and many blessings in the coming year (and decade!) to come. Encourage your hopes and not your fears.
2 comments:
I'm going to dance tonight when I make dinner! :)
I really love the new name of the blog - very fitting.
This post (and the one that follows) are amazing. Really. Reading them is so inspiring to me. I am so damn happy that you danced in the middle of the street - we should all feel such freedom and exuberance from time to time.
It isn't fair that it takes such hardship and challenge to have the positive feelings that you now have, but I think that just the way life is. It has to be like that for us to actually begin to grasp what this all means and how special it all is.
As for that bloody scar - own it! I'm sure that something like that can be disastrous to self-esteem, and you might look at it as negatively affecting your appearance, but you shouldn't! Of course you will, who wouldn't? But I truly hope that in some way, you look at it and see power. It makes a beautiful statement of the capability to overcome and conquer in life. Something you can share with the rest of us.
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